[Movies] Children of the Corn V: Fields of Terror (DVD) review

It’s been quite a few years since I watched the first three Children of the Corn movies, with the first one being the best, of course. A few days ago I came into possession of a box set containing most of the films on DVD — the collection literally showed up randomly in my collection and I’d never purchased it. I sat down to watch the fifth movie in the franchise, Fields of Terror, and boy was it… a thing, I guess.

Children of the Corn V:  Fields of Terror starts out like any other horror movie would. Some college students, who are all played by people in their late twenties, are on the backroads of America. They’re all headed towards some vague destination to sprinkle the ashes of a friend that recently passed away. It’s the beginning of the movie and they’ve already split the group into two cars. Yea, most of them will die.

The first car has a girl and a guy — the latter having a sex doll fetish, I think — who stumble into a corn field and are promptly slaughtered by some kids. As with all of the Children of the Corn movies, these aren’t normal kids, bur rather worshippers of a being known only as He Who Walks Behind the Rows.

The second car crashes into another cornfield a little while later and the occupants meet the same kids. Weirdly, the kids let this lot of out-of-work actors go without much hesitation. The adults head into the nearest town to find someone who can tow and fix their car.

Of course, nothing goes according to plan and the townsfolk aren’t all that helpful. The group decides to head back to their car and spend the night there. When they eventually reach it, the vehicle has been torched. From here they spend the night in an abandoned farmhouse and after discovering the corpses of their dead friends in a nearby field, that’s when the shit hits the fan.

One after another the sheriff and college students are picked off by the Children of the Corn. The killings in this direct-to-video flick are some of the tamest in any horror movie. Not only is the blood basically red water, but there are hardly any special effects. This is pretty much a low-budget cash-in on the series.

I mentioned earlier that this is a standard horror movie, but I lied there. Over the years I’ve watched a lot of terrible films (Castle Freak, anyone?) and this is easily one of the worst horror, nay, worst movies I’ve watched. The writers managed to cram quite a bit of story and character dialogue into Fields of Terror, but that hurts the film. It results in an incredibly slow-paced film with minutes of nothing ever really happening. I honestly tried by best to stay awake through it to the point where I considered using matchsticks to prop open my eyelids.

The actors do absolutely nothing to save the film, even with Eva Mendes and David Carradine playing major roles. Hell, most of the actors are phone in their C-grade performances, which make late-night infomercials look convincing. The moment I saw that Adam Wylie was in Fields of Terror, I knew I was in for one of the worst acted movies to ever be produced.

Along with the story and acting, the editing is choppy with very dark cinematography. Some of the scenes are just too dark to see what’s going on, while others have the strangest filming techniques. Let’s just say, not even the Razzies will be considering Field of Terror for an award.

I don’t remember a single thing about the music, either. Was their any music?

If you’re a die-hard fan of the Children of the Corn franchise, then you pretty much have to watch this. For anyone else, there’s a reason you probably haven’t heard about this movie.

Verdict: Avoid.

If you’re looking to get into the Childen of the Corn movie series, Raru sells most of them here [affiliate link].